Is the following deus-ex-machina? If so, should I remove it?
I wrote a novel called Animal Suicide. It's a mix of romance and dark humor. It's about a girl who, after a weird incident, postpones a pill overdose and starts researching about the topic of animal suicide (sorry for repeating this on the site, but it's to make the question clearer).
The "universe" of this novel is set in real life, but, like in many humorous stories, it has its own crazy phenomena. For instance, Li-Mei, the protagonist, encounters two kinds of people: those who think that animal suicide is a crazy/taboo topic and those who are actively researching it. So, she eventually stumbles into an Animal Suicide Club and a lady who has been obsessed with animal suicide since childhood.
Everything is OK. But here's the problem: readers think that having Li-Mei find people who are interested in animal suicide is too convenient, kind of like deus-ex-machina.
So, I don't know what to do. Should I just remove all these deus-ex-machina? Or find a way to make them more "agreeable"?
EDIT (based on Lauren's answer):
Detailed example: At the animal behavior class, Li-Mei is laughed at for asking about animal suicide. That's how the founder of the Animal Suicide Club (who's in the class) finds her. Is this still deus-ex-machina?
As others have said, people tend to notice others with common interests, and they tend to go to places where people with …
9y ago
If Li-Mei gets laughed at the Animal Behaviour class and gets attention of the founder and if all of this happens right …
9y ago
As Ville Niemi comments above, the simplest way to make this not a coincidence is to have your protagonist do some work …
9y ago
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/17780. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
3 answers
As others have said, people tend to notice others with common interests, and they tend to go to places where people with common interests are likely to go.
Suppose you are really interested in, say, Amish furniture. You are driving down the street and you see an Amish furniture store. Is that a bizarre coincidence. Probably not. In your drive you passed dozens, maybe hundreds of stores selling many different products. You noticed the one that interested you. If someone asked me if there are stores in my home town that sell golf clubs I'd have no idea, because I've never played golf and have no interest in golf. I might pass such a store every day and I wouldn't notice, because I don't care.
Suppose you said that a character loves cherry pie, and so he regularly goes to a bakery called "Fruit Pie Palace", and there he meets someone else who loves cherry pie. That wouldn't be strange or a bizarre coincidence. That would be exactly the sort of place you'd expect to go to meet such a person, and exactly the sort of person you'd expect to meet at such a place.
In your example, I'd expect someone interested in animal suicide might show up at a class in animal psychology. That doesn't seem strange or a coincidence at all. If you said that she took a class in French poetry or auto mechanics and met someone there interested in animal suicide, that would be more of a stretch. But I'd think that just saying that this is a class in animal psychology makes it not a surprising meeting.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/17798. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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If Li-Mei gets laughed at the Animal Behaviour class and gets attention of the founder and if all of this happens right before the first act ends or the first 20-22% of the novel which sets her story goal and the story question, it's not a Deus ex Machina.
If it doesn't happen in the first act and happens elsewhere and entering the club is crucial for the story to move forward, it is a Deus ex Machina and you should remove coincidences and make her work for it.
Why it's not deus ex machina if it happens on the first 20-22% and not if it happens after?
Because it sets the story goal when in 1st act. That scene (and other scenes in the 1st act) will aid her or give motivation to solve the story question too. Elsewhere, it becomes a coincidence to move the story forward for which she will have to work for the course of the novel.
A deus ex machina happens when the writer has gone to deep and generated so many conflicts that even he doesn't know how the protagonist will find a way out. So, the writer comes up with a sudden coincidence which fixes things and moves the story forward keeping the protagonist's motivation intact.
The scene in the first act will lead her towards finding motivation. That's why it's not a deus ex machina in the first act. (It's more in the lines of being an inciting incident. Inciting incidents usually sets the protagonist towards the end of the first act where he/she must make a decision which again leads to having motivation and sets story goal and all. Coincidences are fine when it comes to inciting incidents. More about inciting incident here and here.)
If the scene is in the second act or elsewhere, she already has the motivation and her goals set - she's running after something. Maybe the plot requires her to meet with the club founder. Which means it's a link making her move closer to completing the story goal. And if that link is 'given' to her by a coincidence, it becomes a deus ex machina.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/17792. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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As Ville Niemi comments above, the simplest way to make this not a coincidence is to have your protagonist do some work to find these people.
In fact, I can't imagine how she could casually stumble over something called an Animal Suicide Club. It's the "Club" part which requires the work. Animal suicide researchers, yes, you'd probably find those without an enormous amount of Googling. But a club? People who make investigating animal suicides a hobby? You aren't going to see that posted on a flier at the local coffee shop. Other than at a veeeeeeery outré small liberal arts college, this is a group of people who will be weird even to the animal psychologists studying this behavior for a living. She's going to have to go looking for them — hear rumors, get slapped down by researchers who think the club is full of dangerous idiots and don't want her involved, warned off by ex-members, that sort of thing. Finding the club should be a significant obstacle in itself.
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