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Q&A

Should I completely eliminate passive voice

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I have read that a lot of passive voice deadens the story to 2 dimensional even if you are just trying to show something that takes time when you use the passive voice.

I quite often use passive voice.

A few examples from the Rubiks World novel I am working on are:

The 17x17 was most likely to be electrocuted.

Unfortunately, the 17x17 was electrocuted.(This and the sentence above both refer to the thunderstorm that happened on the very first day before they even built shelter)

While the 15x15 was pregnant, many new things were done.

Now most of my passive voice sentences have "was" in them.

An example though of one without was is:

He could be attacked without dying.(this is referring to the collection of big cats for meat, bone, and domestication(mainly cheetahs for domestication and bigger cats for meat and bone)).

In case you are wondering why I have numbers as characters, these numbers are representing the rubiks cubes and the rubiks cubes are the characters.

So should I completely eliminate passive voice from this novel I am working on or do some sentences need to be in passive voice(like the ones referring to the thunderstorm)?

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2 answers

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The use of active or passive voice is dictated by where your focus is: on the subject or object of the actiin.

Who is your sentence/paragraph/chapter about? John or Bob?

If it is about John and what he does, use the active voice:

John killed Bob.

If it is about Bob and what he experiences, use the passive voice:

Bob had been killed by John.

 


Should you build a car without a reverse gear just because driving backwards from New York to Baltimore would get you arrested or killed?

The abuse of passive voice by mediocre writers does not make it useless.

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"X was most likely to be electrocuted" doesn't have an actor, so that's fine as is.

But if you have "many new things were done," tell us by whom, and what they did.

While the 15x15 was pregnant, the three-bys were busy building houses, the 9x9s dug latrines, and the lone Whip-It sat in the makeshift cage, wondering when his sentence would be carried out.

I'd say make the effort to remove passive voice whenever you can, and add detail, action, and movement in those spots.

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