How far underneath the surface is the message of a story?
It seems like in some stories, you can feel the theme pervading through every element. In other stories, you don't know what you're reading about until the very last line.
I'd guess I lean on the side of a bit more obvious than not, but how do I make sure that I'm not beating the reader over the head with my ideas?
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Personally, I think the theme does not have to be obvious at all, or ever stated. It just needs to be consistent. For example, if there is some life philosphy in your story, "love will triumph", then make sure love does indeed triumph, in some way or another, and a lack of it or hate or greed does not triumph in the end.
Don't tell us the theme, show us the consequences or ramifications of your idea for the theme.
Many stories achieve commercial success without making their theme explicit, or if they do state it explicitly, it was offhand enough I didn't connect it as such. The theme is satisfying not because we know what it is, but because it causes character's stories to resonate with each other, if it bends all their arcs in similar and consistent patterns.
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