Is using an 'empty' metaphor considered bad style?
I just had this sentence off my head:
A crown of fire spread through the country consuming everything on its way.
What I mean by empty metaphor is a metaphor that doesn't really have any meaning or even purpose. The same sentence could be replaced with the following:
A circle of fire spread through the country consuming everything on its way.
Also, I don't even think crown would make sense even if the "fire" was spread by an evil king. What do you think?
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2 answers
This isn't bad style
"A crown of fire" is a an evocative statement full of imagery and connotations. Instantly, I can imagine the burning ring of flame, progressing outward and reaching up to the sky. The sentence may not make literal sense but certainly is a good description.
In contrast "a circle of fire" seems somewhat lame. It describes the physical shape of the fire (potentially 'ring' would be better) but it does little to describe the appearance of the flame.
More generally there isn't really such a thing as "bad style" just different style. Whether this is good or not depends on if it fits into the style and structure of the rest of your work. A single empty metaphor in an otherwise literal piece will feel out of place. But if your work is full of this type of description then it will be fine.
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It isn't exactly empty; a spreading circle of fire might look like a growing crown; with high fire on the perimeter and no fire in the middle. (But ending with "on its way" throws me, it should be "consuming everything in its way").
That said, aside from your example, if your metaphor is obscure and has no obvious application to what is being described, then it breaks the flow of reading because the reader struggles to reconcile this. That would be bad style.
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