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Q&A Building empathy with a character and interest in a story

Two suggestions: 1) The reader knows that the killer is after Pete the Protagonist, right? So the killer is stalking Pete, in increasingly tense scenarios. Each time the killer gets closer but doe...

posted 9y ago by Lauren Ipsum‭  ·  last activity 5y ago by System‭

Answer
#4: Attribution notice removed by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-13T12:00:32Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/20185
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T04:52:56Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/20185
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by (deleted user) · 2019-12-08T04:52:56Z (almost 5 years ago)
Two suggestions:

1) The reader knows that the killer is after Pete the Protagonist, right? So the killer is stalking Pete, in increasingly tense scenarios. Each time the killer gets closer but doesn't kill Pete... yet. This leaves the reader screaming "He's in the net aisle!" because we don't know when the killer is going to come around the corner and finally take a shot at Pete.

2) A third character knows the killer is after Pete, and manages to get off some kind of garbled warning before the killer takes that person out. So Pete is partially warned — warned to avoid a woman with a limp? a very short man? a tall black woman with light hazel eyes? — but doesn't know why he should avoid this person.

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2015-12-23T11:05:49Z (almost 9 years ago)
Original score: 0