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In a situation where a POV character isn't lucid enough to see or interpret what's going on around them, I find myself constantly describing things either in passive voice, or by using the word 'so...
#3: Attribution notice added
by
System
·
2019-12-08T06:19:57Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/27520 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
by
Typoglyphic
·
2019-12-08T06:19:57Z (almost 5 years ago)
In a situation where a POV character isn't lucid enough to see or interpret what's going on around them, I find myself constantly describing things either in passive voice, or by using the word 'something' or 'someone' in every other sentence. An example in which someone is on the floor and an unknown entity is poking them can be written like: > Something poked her shoulder. Or like: > She felt a poke in her shoulder. > > Her shoulder was poked. The former is better in short doses, but can you recommend a few other structures to spice up a scene where many of such descriptions are necessary? Thank you.
#1: Imported from external source
by
System
·
2017-04-13T07:59:56Z (over 7 years ago)
Original score: 2