How do I represent two computers having a conversation between themselves that other characters are unaware of?
I have two computers who are talking to each other in a movie script. They do not want the humans to be aware of this but my ideas to address it don't seem to work. HELP! Here's what I have tried so far
BBC Sherlock text message approach
computer 1 ( text ) hi there
computer 2 ( text ) all good?
Does a voice over work? It's important to the script as the computers hidden intelligence is a key plot line.
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I've just thought . . . In the opening of "Millennial" I attempted animate inanimate objects. Whilst it may not specifically answer your question it may give you ideas on how to set up a suitable environment.
A plethora of CCTV cameras tracked the young woman's brisk progress toward the corner of Main and Third. The nationwide Echelon Plus software performed due diligence but paid the woman no particular attention: Corrine Pearl Radman; 29, credit rating 637, a single white female, ordinary, not a person of interest, insignificant.
Wherever the CCTV cameras didn't have line-of-sight, eyes on the subject, the GPS satellite tracked her phone and Wi-Fi Access points recorded the phone's MAC address as she passed by.
The Supreme Court had ruled: the fourth amendment applied only to citizens, the right to privacy did not apply to cell phones. Government tracking of electronic devices did not in any way violate the Constitution.
Corrine continued her journey, following the flow of human traffic. Inside her pocket the iPhone buzzed and vibrated as responses to her audacious tweet flooded in. Without breaking stride, she cursed, reached into her pocket, located the power button, and switched the phone off. "Leave me the fuck alone."
The GPS satellite and the Wi-fi Access Points immediately reported 'loss of signal'. The Echelon Plus software followed protocol and requested discovery via cell tower triangulation. After attempting to locate the subject's device, the cell towers returned a report stating all pings to the specified device had timed-out – communication had failed. Instantly, powerful, multi-processor systems came online and ran facial recognition algorithms. The length of Main Street CCTV cameras swivelled, turned, and scanned in an attempt to relocate the subject. At 08:58 node WS4476 compared the likeness of the subject who had exited South Ferry Station at 08:52 with the subject rapidly approaching Third Street: 99.57% - a match. Subject reacquired: Corrine Pearl Radman; US citizen, 29, credit rating 637, a single white female, ordinary, not a person of interest.
STOP! The red man insisted everybody wait at Third Street crosswalk for further instructions. "You're kidding me!" Corrine puffed her cheeks, folded her arms, and waited. "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!" she mumbled, tapping a foot impatiently on the sidewalk.
- I won't bore you with much more but the opening scene (the character walking to work) informs the reader that all devices communicate (the character thinks they conspire against her). Language such as, "The iris scanning terminal of security system informed the HR system that MS Radman had entered the building at 9:03" reinforces the belief that devices and systems communicate. (As the story rolls on it becomes clear that computer systems have agendas.
My point is: Once this environment is established communication between computers is treated as as you would do for any character. In a film script there are options as to how their communication is SHOWN. Text on screen is probably favourite for your scenario as it creates the impression: the audience can see the computers' communication but the other characters cannot.
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In this case the Computers are the characters (the actors on screen).
Narrator Not Necessarily Needed
There is no need of a narrator. In this case I imagined the movie camera (the shot) moving from the first computer and showing text message shows up on the screen. Then, move to the 2nd computer and the text message shows up on that screen and then the reply shows up. Move back to first computer. Etc.
The director will make this work the same way she would move shots back an forth from each character as they are speaking.
In this case the computers can look different and the environment where each computer is can be different so viewers can tell the two computers are communicating only to each other with no one else around.
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I'd say that whether you need a voiceover reading out the messages or not depends on how long the conversation goes on for.
In the example you gave - Sherlock - the text conversations rarely last for more than about two or three replies, and if they do, they're usually punctuated by other characters interrupting, or the texter visibly reacting to the replies. Neither of those things can really happen with your computer chat. The sad truth is that audiences have short attention spans, so if your silent text conversation goes on for too long, it might get boring.
The anime Durarara has similar text conversations, taking place within an online chatroom, that go on for significantly longer. These have a voiceover, for two main reasons:
- To make the scene more interesting than just watching messages pop up on a computer screen for an entire minute
- To remind the audience who each participant in the chat is, since they're all using pseudonyms (and eventually there's enough people in the chatroom that it would get confusing otherwise)
If your chats go on for any length of time, or if there's any ambiguity about which of the computers is which, you'll probably need a voiceover.
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It is somewhat difficult to answer your question in its current form, but I shall give it a try.
The motion picture medium leaves you with three ways of conveying information to the spectators: show the physical events as they are happening, tell the viewer about them, using one of the characters, or actually spell them out as an on-screen text, the stylistics of which can vary greatly--from "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away..." to the text message bubbles.
The on-screen overlay of the text-message-styled conversation seems to be, while not revolutionary new, quite an effective way of presenting what you want to tell the viewers (voice-over might interfere with the audible dialog between humans, which could be happening in the scene).
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