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In other words, is it strange/confusing to do this? For the next few seconds, I watched Aiko read the letter with her lips agape---lips that steadily curled up into a smile. A contagious one....
#3: Attribution notice added
by
System
·
2019-12-08T06:38:35Z (over 4 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/28726 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
by
alex
·
2019-12-08T06:38:35Z (over 4 years ago)
In other words, is it strange/confusing to do this? > For the next few seconds, I watched Aiko read the letter with her lips agape---lips that steadily curled up into a smile. A contagious one. Because before realizing it, I found myself smiling too, enjoying a happiness that came from someone else's heart. It was my first time. > > A first time that wouldn't last. > > **"Hey, Daichi." Kiyoshi tapped me on my shoulder.** As opposed of writing: **"Hey, Daichi," Kiyoshi said, tapping me on my shoulder.** Why or why not?
#1: Imported from external source
by
System
·
2017-06-15T14:29:45Z (almost 7 years ago)
Original score: 7