Can I be a writer, with a mental illness?
I want to be a writer, but I have struggled with Schizoaffective Disorder for quite some time. Some of the symptoms of the disorder are amotivation and trouble with initiation (Getting things started). I have written many, many incomplete short stories over the past eight years, and my writing is improving... but I want to make this more than just a hobby of mine. I've considered schooling, but I really have to get a handle on my procrastination, or just plain forgetfulness, or lack of motivation, or whatever it is...
Perhaps its due to all the thinking I do instead of writing. I used to think so much, worry, until I could no longer function, and have had to quit jobs because of it. I wasn't very talented at work, whatever work it was, because I would be trapped in my head instead of being on task. I have came leaps and bounds in this regard. I have come to a new beginning, where I am no longer trapped by my own thinking.
I quit drinking, which was a huge distraction from writing, and made my writing worse. I even quit smoking! My life has a normal routine to it now, of psycho-social groups and exercise. My life is heading in a positive direction. I just need something to kick-start my writing.
I want to write a novel
I have the ideas, I'm just afraid that I will give up after I make the outline, like I used to do. At my group they have a room where they allow me to write undisturbed.
My questions are, how much time should I dedicate to writing during the week? (like how many hours each day?) How can I stay motivated, and stick to my goal? Is it possible to write and have a mental illness? How can I stay focused, and not want to write something else even a chapter or two into it? ... and, is writing as a career possible for me?
Thank you.
Jared.
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First of all I'm not a doctor and good luck with your schizoaffective disorder. I cannot imagine the extent of its effect over your life; that's something you have to judge by yourself.
But from what you write, it seems you have already made progress in other areas of your life - e.g. quitting drinking and smoking, better dealing with your job and such - despite your mental illness. Why would writing should be any different? So my answer is definitely yes, at least to the main question.
Going over the others:
How much time should I dedicate to writing during the week?
Up to you, but from what I heard, a good practice is to struggle and write something - anything - everyday, just to keep an habit. So let's say, half an hour a day? Someone suggests counting up the number of words you write rather than the time you spend writing them, but in the end is quite the same. You have to keep your gears running. The point is making an habit out of it. You'll find tons of answers on this question on the site, you'll just have to look around.
How can I stay motivated, and stick to my goal?
I'm not the best counselor on this, since I'm struggling with the same issue. I'd say: try to break your goal into smaller pieces - that are more easily achievable. "I want a novel done" seems quite a far-away target, and it takes a lot of time to get it done. If you manage to write, let's say, one or two pages a day, you'll just be one or two pages closer to your goal... and novels can have hundreds of pages. Not really reassuring, is it?
Think differently. What gets me going is, rather, "I want to write this scene" or "I want to make those characters meet, and do something". It might be poor outlining, but I tend to build my stories around characters and events. I know in advance most of the important stuff that is going to happen and I usually fill in the blanks between one "important scene" and the other.
The good part of this is that you can set some more reachable milestones: in my opinion, it's more rewarding. You'll go sleeping thinking "Ah, finally I made that thing happen. I think it played out well, now, up to the next one".
Is it possible to write and have a mental illness?
Imho, yes. As I said.
How can I stay focused, and not want to write something else even a chapter or two into it?
Well, we already talk about two problems here: the fact that you cannot write consistently and the fact you can't seem to finish a novel. I'd say it's better to address them one at a time: first, start following a writing routine until "it works". Then worry about keeping faithful to a story.
From a personal point of view, if you're having problems with writing in general, worrying about writing a novel doesn't help much. If you're trying to follow a daily routine, but can't seem to progress on your novel, just write something else and call it a day. Sure, the con is that your novel won't get any further, but at least you have written something, instead of looking at a blank page in guilt.
is writing as a career possible for me?
Again, honestly: why not?
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I think a good strategy is to pick (even randomly) a story you want to write and start sinking some cost into it. In other words before putting anything down, do a number of days of research on the subject. Write small stories connected to your novel. Create a mini universe as a starting point if it's fiction, or put down a plan if it's non-fiction. But, do at least a few days of research first. I'll tell you a bit of my own experience.
I am not a writer, but I'm half way through my first novel. I'm a scientist who happens to have a mental illness. After a few years of medication, it seems to be under control. When it wasn't under control, my inspiration seemed boundless. I also think I had more feelings and more intuition.
At the beginning, I had to take larger doses of medicine and that made it impossible for me to work or write. At this time, the doses are smaller and I can function. As a scientist, I'm better. I'm more focused and more disciplined. As a writer, I tend to lose inspiration. I have bipolar disorder, so before being medicated, I used to gush a whole chapter in one day. Then I'd scrap it and write another chapter of something completely different. If you have this kind of problem, better write short stories.
But, I'm writing a (fiction) novel. To write a novel, I need to be able to stay with it for a long time. I've been writing for more than one year. I don't care so much when I finish, because it's not my day job. My trick to stay focused was to write about myself. My characters all have a piece of myself or of what I wished to be. There is always in my story a little something that stuck to my memory. Somewhere there is a white picket fence from a beautiful house I've seen in Pennsylvania, and so on.
My book will probably end being 3-400 pages long. But there are maybe thousands of things I imagined happening to my characters. They all have stories, each of which could be written in a more or less interesting book. Every time I have a little break from my actual work, I think of what would be the most probable improbable and interesting thing that could happen next in my story. When I find something I believe it's clever, I can't wait to make a little time to write it down.
Then there is Sutter Kane. Kane is my alter ego. Every time I go off tangent and think something else would make a wonderful subject of one of my books, one of my characters reads or quotes from a great Sutter Kane book. I don't know if any of Sutter Kane's ideas will make it into the final version, but it's my way of dealing with my mind going all over place.
More to the point: I try to find chunks of times to do my writing. I don't write without doing a little research first and thinking about what should be in the chapter. I think of many possible scenarios, and then I vote the best. Then I write down, preferably starting in the morning so I have time to write a significant part of the chapter in one day. Over the next days I keep editing. Then I move on.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/29373. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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