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Q&A How do I write a generic romantic relationship between a male anti-hero and a female antagonist?

In broad terms this depends on what you think of as "romantic", whether it is just sexual or they truly enjoy each other's company outside of the bedroom. An easy way to accomplish this is to refe...

posted 7y ago by Amadeus‭  ·  edited 5y ago by Amadeus‭

Answer
#5: Post edited by user avatar Amadeus‭ · 2020-01-23T18:45:34Z (almost 5 years ago)
  • In broad terms this depends on what you think of as "romantic", whether it is just sexual or they truly enjoy each other's company outside of the bedroom.
  • An easy way to accomplish this is to refer to a previous history: Your hero wasn't always a hero, and your villain wasn't always a villain.
  • I understand if you've never had a relationship; but most adults IRL have before the age of 22 or so. So it is plausible neither of these characters is virginal and it could easily be they were mutually first-time lovers back in high school (or generally as teens, depending on the time period you write about), long before they were either hero or villain.
  • You say you have an anti-hero; that implies flaws: Perhaps as a teen these flaws were much more predominant and that is what attracted her, and what she loved about him. So they are still in touch (literally and figuratively), still hooking up, but she is hiding her true self from him. In the years since their first experience, he has been tending toward the good, but she has gone deeper into her dark nature than he knows, and has been lying to him about that for years. He knows she has dark thoughts, but he thinks it is just a fantasy of hers like playing an evil character in a role-playing-game; he doesn't know exactly what she has done in real life.
  • This relationship makes it more plausible that recently, something new has come along (The Big Story Problem) that is going to put them in conflict. Just because they are sharing the space. He feels compelled to help people, she sees a chance to exploit those people and get rich or powerful or whatever you are making her want.
  • Without your own romantic experience, you need to study (watch or read and think about) how other writers (for film or print) have portrayed romances. You don't want to plagiarize them, but keep yourself "above the story" and generalize what they did: what kinds of settings worked? What kinds of lines worked? How do other authors avoid writing porn (which I assume you want to do, lacking experience), and skip over the scene where they get naked and have sex, but still make sure the readers understand the characters did?
  • Many other authors have distilled their own real romantic and sexual experiences for you; if you read enough of these, treating them as textbook examples; teach yourself some "rules" they seem to follow, you can write a plausible romance scene or sex scene.
  • Or you can try to make it up: Most authors write successfully about murders, torture, heists, bank robberies, rapes, kidnappings and many other topics without **_ever_** having done or experienced them. So it is possible, but I think it takes being able to read what others have written while not getting emotionally immersed in their story, but staying analytically above it and trying to notice their writing craft: What they are telling you, and what they are leaving out, or glossing over, or just jump-cutting over.
  • In broad terms this depends on what you think of as "romantic", whether it is just sexual or they truly enjoy each other's company outside of the bedroom.
  • An easy way to accomplish this is to refer to a previous history: Your hero wasn't always a hero, and your villain wasn't always a villain.
  • I understand if you've never had a relationship; but most adults IRL have before the age of 22 or so. So it is plausible neither of these characters is virginal and it could easily be they were mutually first-time lovers back in high school (or generally as teens, depending on the time period you write about), long before they were either hero or villain.
  • You say you have an anti-hero; that implies flaws: Perhaps as a teen these flaws were much more predominant and that is what attracted her, and what she loved about him. So they are still in touch (literally and figuratively), still hooking up, but she is hiding her true self from him. In the years since their first experience, he has been tending toward the good, but she has gone deeper into her dark nature than he knows, and has been lying to him about that for years. He knows she has dark thoughts, but he thinks it is just a fantasy of hers like playing an evil character in a role-playing-game; he doesn't know exactly what she has done in real life.
  • This relationship makes it more plausible that recently, something new has come along (The Big Story Problem) that is going to put them in conflict. Just because they are sharing the space. He feels compelled to help people, she sees a chance to exploit those people and get rich or powerful or whatever you are making her want.
  • Without your own romantic experience, you need to study (watch or read and think about) how other writers (for film or print) have portrayed romances. You don't want to plagiarize them, but keep yourself "above the story" and generalize what they did: what kinds of settings worked? What kinds of lines worked? How do other authors avoid writing porn (which I assume you want to do, lacking experience), and skip over the scene where they get naked and have sex, but still make sure the readers understand the characters did?
  • Many other authors have distilled their own real romantic and sexual experiences for you; if you read enough of these, treating them as textbook examples; teach yourself some "rules" they seem to follow, you can write a plausible romance scene or sex scene.
  • Or you can try to make it up: Most authors write successfully about murders, torture, heists, bank robberies, rapes, kidnappings and many other topics without **_ever_** having done or experienced them. So it is possible, but I think it takes being able to read what others have written while not getting emotionally immersed in their story, but staying analytically above it and trying to notice their writing craft: What they are telling you, and what they are leaving out, or glossing over, or just jump-cutting over.
#4: Attribution notice removed by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-19T22:13:08Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/30179
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T06:59:53Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/30179
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by (deleted user) · 2019-12-08T06:59:53Z (about 5 years ago)
In broad terms this depends on what you think of as "romantic", whether it is just sexual or they truly enjoy each other's company outside of the bedroom.

An easy way to accomplish this is to refer to a previous history: Your hero wasn't always a hero, and your villain wasn't always a villain.

I understand if you've never had a relationship; but most adults IRL have before the age of 22 or so. So it is plausible neither of these characters is virginal and it could easily be they were mutually first-time lovers back in high school (or generally as teens, depending on the time period you write about), long before they were either hero or villain.

You say you have an anti-hero; that implies flaws: Perhaps as a teen these flaws were much more predominant and that is what attracted her, and what she loved about him. So they are still in touch (literally and figuratively), still hooking up, but she is hiding her true self from him. In the years since their first experience, he has been tending toward the good, but she has gone deeper into her dark nature than he knows, and has been lying to him about that for years. He knows she has dark thoughts, but he thinks it is just a fantasy of hers like playing an evil character in a role-playing-game; he doesn't know exactly what she has done in real life.

This relationship makes it more plausible that recently, something new has come along (The Big Story Problem) that is going to put them in conflict. Just because they are sharing the space. He feels compelled to help people, she sees a chance to exploit those people and get rich or powerful or whatever you are making her want.

Without your own romantic experience, you need to study (watch or read and think about) how other writers (for film or print) have portrayed romances. You don't want to plagiarize them, but keep yourself "above the story" and generalize what they did: what kinds of settings worked? What kinds of lines worked? How do other authors avoid writing porn (which I assume you want to do, lacking experience), and skip over the scene where they get naked and have sex, but still make sure the readers understand the characters did?

Many other authors have distilled their own real romantic and sexual experiences for you; if you read enough of these, treating them as textbook examples; teach yourself some "rules" they seem to follow, you can write a plausible romance scene or sex scene.

Or you can try to make it up: Most authors write successfully about murders, torture, heists, bank robberies, rapes, kidnappings and many other topics without **_ever_** having done or experienced them. So it is possible, but I think it takes being able to read what others have written while not getting emotionally immersed in their story, but staying analytically above it and trying to notice their writing craft: What they are telling you, and what they are leaving out, or glossing over, or just jump-cutting over.

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2017-09-11T19:22:06Z (over 7 years ago)
Original score: 3