How much dialogue in a first date scene?
Something I always get stuck with is how to describe a first date. E.g. I have a story where 2 characters are on a blind date, so they have to get to know each other. How much of the date should be telling? How much should be showing? Is it okay to let the characters know each other through dialogue, even if it's mostly small talk? (where are you from, what do you do for a living etc..)
Cheers.
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Awkward talks, no words, a night full of talking, all are realistic parts of a potential first date let alone a blind one. This also greatly depends on their personalities. Is one shy? is one aggressive? Is one talkative? Too talkative and doesn't give the other a chance to talk? Do they both have common interests or nothing at all? Are they both attractive? Does one find the other attractive but not the other way around? All of these elements go into a first date.
It is said that usually, people know within the first 5 minutes whether or not this person is worth their time, getting a second date, spending the night together, if it's just a one-night thing, long-term thing, or a casual nothing serious thing.
So ultimately, the answer depends on you the writer and how you want it to go, and how their pesonalities will contribute to the interaction. First dates can have as much or as little talking as desired.
Jessica was fidgeting with the cloth napkin; She has never been to a five star restaurant before and did not want to order anything too expensive and stammered in reply "I don't really know what I want."
"Maybe I can help! I hear the Salmon with wild rice is amazing but I usually order one of their steaks."
"But.. That is so expensive! Anyways... I am actually alegric to fish... the steak does look good but I couldn't ask you to spend $100 just for a steak."
"Good thing you told me you are alergic, I was actually going to order some fish this time but I will avoid it. I don't want you to have a bad night on our first date. Don't worry about the costs though okay? I want you to enjoy yourself and the night. I guess Katy didn't tell you but I am an engineer for my profession and actually eat here often. So please, pick what you want okay?" He was trying to get her to relax. Though they were both nervous, it was clear Katy did not provide her much information about him and she was out of her element.
"Oh! No... Katy didn't tell me much about you besides that you are a good-looking, hard working man and that she thinks we would be really good for each other. Are you sure I can order anything?" Jessica was feeling a little relieved to hear that he was not stretching his wallet for this date.
As you can see the dialog does a lot to disclose information about each other to each other that may or may not already be known by the readers for a heavy dialog scene. So have fun with it! Imagine your first blind date and what it would be like for you or just even a first date in general! Imagine the date with them as it relates to their personalities! As I said, it ultimately depends on you and how you want the dynamics to go. My example may or may not work for your situation, but I provided one to show you how dynamics could be written.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/31764. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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I would avoid the "fact based" small talk (where are you from, what's your job, etc). I would not even tell about it, unless it is critical to the plot. I'd just dismiss that as five minutes of awkward biography before we came to a real question.
As a general rule, always make your dialogue contested, challenged, conflicted, whatever you want to call it. That is interesting to read about.
Even in a first date situation, isn't it best when you get into friendly debate (on some topic you aren't going to get angry about)?
Isn't what is interesting about somebody the attitudes or likes or dislikes you wouldn't have expected? The funny stories of their childhood acting career? The haircut they now find the most embarrassing? What is the dumbest compliment you ever gave a date? What fruit flavor do you hate the most?
Some of these are conflicted as challenges to reveal information the other may not wish to reveal, which can create some real conflict, light-hearted conflict by a refusal to reveal or changing the subject.
Of course, if the first date is to go badly, somebody misreads these attempts to find some humorous common ground as interrogation and shuts down; then the conflict is more real and harsh: I'm not having fun and want to leave; this guy/girl is being too nosy; or too crude or too insulting. Negative tensions are easier, positive tension (friendly verbal wrestling) is more difficult, but should be possible if you built your characters to like each other.
Always try to keep some tension in your dialogue, the tension is conflict. If you want the date to go well, the tension is light hearted and funny: I'll show you mine if you show me yours, but as that applies to worst date, shortest date, dumbest venue, or whatever else has happened in their lives.
If the romance is central to the plot, some of these answers can be put to good use later in the plot, for humor or serious purpose (she really DID get to know something personal about her date that helped her find him, for example.)
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