Post History

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/32077
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

You have this problem a few paragraphs into the first chapter.

Don't stop and think now!

Accept that you'll get into the rhythm after a few more paragraphs and that you may even produce a couple of scenes/chapters that aren't much for the world.

The thing is, you will write your first draft badly. Perhaps you'll find a few sentences in a whole page that will do the job of describing this character's actions.

It's OK. You don't need to worry about that now. Chances are, your favorite author does that too!

Once you've written the scene/chapter and let it simmer for a day or two, you might know exactly what to do when you read it again.

However. If you've done all that and you're still lost, then maybe this section should be summarized?

"Show, don't tell" might be causing problems for you.

What is the scene really about? Perhaps you don't need to describe the character's every step and glance? Maybe a single sentence would suffice to get to the core of the scene?

Stick to the true and tested adage of scene writing: start the scene as late as possible and stop it as soon as possible.

If the next step in the character's journey is a bank robbery, perhaps a breakfast scene is of little to no consequence... You could simply do:

> Bob pulled the mask down over his face and tightened the grip on the revolver. His stomach shivered in a way that made him regret the double serving of boiled eggs he'd had for breakfast.

(Of course, if you decide to talk about breakfast eggs, they should reappear--pun intended--later in the scene, perhaps as a DNA-source for the crime scene investigators...)

If you do decide to keep the details, here are a few tips on how to make it work.

Use tension.

If you can crank up the reader's anticipation they will accept a slower pace. You can do this by hinting at a danger. My favorite is the "Bear on the Beach."

A couple is kissing on a beach. Perhaps a bit sexy and exciting, but nothing much happens. We start getting bored. Cut to a wild bear on the beach. Then back to the couple. Anticipation skyrockets. Will they see the bear? What will happen when it sees them? And the couple just keeps kissing and cuddling. The more we dive into the kissing, the more the reader will think of the bear and the more they will bite their nails. Especially if you cut back to the bear. (Yes, this is an example from the movies. In a book you would use scenes or chapters to cut back and forth between, for instance, home invaders preparing a robbery and a family getting ready for bed...)

Introduce threats to your character.

Where is the antagonistic force? In the same room? No? Can the character be sure? In fearing the appearance of an antagonist your character can spend time thinking about the conflict.

You may be able to boil down scenes and chapters into one paranoid set of fears and thoughts...

Or raise the stakes. If his life is at stake, how will he think and feel? Imagine your character balancing on one of the metal beams in those old black and white photos of the Empire State Building construction (I think it is)... hundreds of meters above the ground, no guardrail, no lifeline... if he trips and falls, he's dead.

Make sure your scenes do double, if not triple, duty.

Description should not only describe things. It can also foreshadow (gun on the wall -- yes, you can spend time describing that gun on the wall because the reader anticipates it will be fired at a later time... a promise, buy the way, you must keep...), create atmosphere, and if you have a POV-character, all of this will be done with that character as a filter. If they are scared, make the descriptions and atmosphere scary. If they are bored instead of scared, a creaky old door will be described differently.

When your scenes do several things at the same time each step can become a new clue to the reader about character, milieu, story, theme, plot... your imagination sets the limits!

Original score: 1