Communities

Writing
Writing
Codidact Meta
Codidact Meta
The Great Outdoors
The Great Outdoors
Photography & Video
Photography & Video
Scientific Speculation
Scientific Speculation
Cooking
Cooking
Electrical Engineering
Electrical Engineering
Judaism
Judaism
Languages & Linguistics
Languages & Linguistics
Software Development
Software Development
Mathematics
Mathematics
Christianity
Christianity
Code Golf
Code Golf
Music
Music
Physics
Physics
Linux Systems
Linux Systems
Power Users
Power Users
Tabletop RPGs
Tabletop RPGs
Community Proposals
Community Proposals
tag:snake search within a tag
answers:0 unanswered questions
user:xxxx search by author id
score:0.5 posts with 0.5+ score
"snake oil" exact phrase
votes:4 posts with 4+ votes
created:<1w created < 1 week ago
post_type:xxxx type of post
Search help
Notifications
Mark all as read See all your notifications »
Q&A

Post History

50%
+0 −0
Q&A What are the limits to description in story writing? How do I know if I have crossed them?

The central issue here is not the extent of description, it is focus. Good prose allows the reader to focus on one thing at a time. When it is time to describe, it describes. When it is time to dea...

posted 6y ago by Mark Baker‭  ·  last activity 5y ago by System‭

Answer
#4: Attribution notice removed by user avatar System‭ · 2020-01-03T20:41:57Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35207
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T08:33:04Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35207
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T08:33:04Z (almost 5 years ago)
The central issue here is not the extent of description, it is focus. Good prose allows the reader to focus on one thing at a time. When it is time to describe, it describes. When it is time to deal with action, it deals with the action. If a description of the setting is necessary to understand the action, then the setting is described first and the action afterwards.

If you look at the sample you provided, however, the focus is all over the place. It moves rapidly back and forth between description and action, between past and present, between detail and general scene. The reader cannot find a point of focus.

A common reaction to this is to tell the writer to cut out the description and get on with this action, but you should not interpret this as an instruction to provide less description. Rather, you should interpret it as an instruction not to pollute the focus of an action scene with description. Describe when it is time to describe. Show action when it is time to show action. Keep the reader focused on one thing at a time.

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2018-04-18T13:40:46Z (over 6 years ago)
Original score: 3