Post History

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35305
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35305
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

> Both are criminals with no redeeming qualities

There's your problem. You have a pair of one-dimensional cartoon supervillains who are evil _just because_. Those kinds of villains are unrealistic and, these days, tend to be less well-received than more nuanced villains. And in describing them, you've focused only on their similarities.

Focus on what makes them **different.** Give them different motivations, and different personalities. Make them stand out from one another. You readers certainly aren't going to root for one side over the other if they can't even tell which side is which.

A good example, off the top of my head, is _Pokémon Emerald_, where you have two opposing groups of villains: one wants to create more landmass, the other wants to create more ocean. It's not their intentions that make them evil, but their _actions_ (stealing Pokemon and equipment, battling anyone who gets in their way, unleashing ancient _kaiju_, etc.). They have distinct uniforms and personalities, and the conflict between them stems from the fact that their goals are diametrically-opposed.

You already have a reason for your groups to oppose each other: they both want to take over the world. Give them different reasons for wanting to do so: maybe one believes they're freeing the masses from tyranny and oppression, while the other believes people are too stupid to be relied upon to govern themselves properly. Give the mooks different reasons for wanting to be part of these groups - they aren't going to be hiveminds, after all.

A final note suggestion would be to focus on the conflict itself, and not the potential consequences if/when either one wins. If the conflict is compelling enough, readers will be enjoying it enough that they won't worry about what might happen afterwards.

Original score: 3