Post History

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35628
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35628
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

You are not foreshadowing correctly; they cannot be unrelated to the story currently happening.

For example, you can foreshadow the more experienced Bill getting killed before the novice Charlie with a war video game in which the more experienced Bill is surprised and beaten by the novice Charlie; but this game is in good fun, remembered fondly by both, and fits into the early narrative.

I suspect you are being too heavy-handed, foreshadowing should not be noticeable, it is intended to resonate **later** , not leave readers wondering. Quitting a job heralds quitting a marriage, cheating on a time sheet heralds cheating on a spouse, losing track of a kid in a mall (but finding them) heralds the kidnapping of the same kid later. Witnessing a fatal heart attack in a restaurant heralds her father's heart attack later.

But if your reader notices "unrelated events" you are not foreshadowing correctly (and it sounds like far too often), your foreshadows should be very limited, to just **very important future incidents** because you want readers to remember them: And (as studies show) few can remember more than five or six such incidents. Three is more likely. And they must fit and flow with the narrative as told, the reader should not wonder why they are there.

Original score: 13