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One of my characters, a kind of spy, goes by several names in the course of her story. The narrator always refers to her by her real name. I make sure she introduces herself by whatever cover name ...
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Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/39734 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/39734 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
One of my characters, a kind of spy, goes by several names in the course of her story. The narrator always refers to her by her real name. I make sure she introduces herself by whatever cover name she is using, and she never fails to answer to it. In about 95% of scenes, everybody is calling her by her cover name. This is true even in an intimate setting with a fellow spy that knows her real name, because no matter how private you think you are, you never know when you might be overheard, recorded, or bugged. So they fool around but neither of them ever breaks character. The narrator never calls her anything but her real name, a constant reminder to the reader she is not the character she is playing. That can work for you too. It sounds like part of your story is this search for self, and that kind of reminder would subtly reinforce that she really hasn't found herself, and perhaps never does.