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Don't make it about him. If it works in your story, switch to her point of view. If you need to stick with your main character's point of view, then focus on him describing her actions as a nar...
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#4: Attribution notice removed
by
System
·
2019-12-20T00:40:32Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/39783 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added
by
System
·
2019-12-08T10:04:01Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/39783 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
Don't make it about him. If it works in your story, switch to her point of view. If you need to stick with your main character's point of view, then focus on him describing her actions as a narrator would and don't focus on what he's feeling. Some feelings will come across and that's fine. Just make it about her. If you have a narrator that moves around, then keep the narrator with your hero and not with your main character at this point. You can move back later, or intersperse.
#1: Imported from external source
by
System
·
2018-11-02T01:17:42Z (about 6 years ago)
Original score: 4