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Q&A How can I make a character who isn't a jerk seem like one?

I like this version of the question better than the last one. There are many ways to be considered a jerk. The most common is someone who deliberately says or does things that are cruel or obnoxi...

posted 6y ago by Cyn‭  ·  last activity 5y ago by System‭

Answer
#4: Attribution notice removed by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-20T00:40:32Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/39882
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T10:05:40Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/39882
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by (deleted user) · 2019-12-08T10:05:40Z (about 5 years ago)
I like this version of the question better than the last one.

There are many ways to be considered a jerk. The most common is someone who deliberately says or does things that are cruel or obnoxious. But another is to be unthinking about people around you. You might be off in your own head, or have difficulty hearing or seeing so you just nod along, or have a disability that interferes with your ability to connect, or just distracted. These things don't make you a jerk, but they can lead other people to think you are.

Your character might not pick up on subtleties very well. This can make him sound harsh when he's only answering a question or stating something that is factual.

He may have been raised with harshness so he echoes the language.

He may, as you suggested elsewhere, be struggling with a trauma that is blunting his emotional response and/or making him unaware of other peoples' difficulties or reactions.

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2018-11-05T03:23:20Z (about 6 years ago)
Original score: 6