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Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/40682
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/40682
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

If I understand the problem correctly, I think what you want to be doing is **vary the subject of your sentences**.

Look at this example:

> John walked out of the office. He observed the sky turning grey, and then felt cold rain landing on him. He opened his umbrella.

Now this:

> John walked out of his office. The sky above was rapidly turning grey. Cold drops trickled down his collar. He opened his umbrella.

Instead of writing "person saw X", you can write "X happened". But there's more: instead of John slipping on the wet pavement and landing face-first in a puddle, it might be _John's heel_ slipping on the wet pavement, and _his face_ landing in a puddle. Or the puddle might rush up to meet his face.

Also, **vary the order of your sentences' various parts.** The subject doesn't always have to come first. Compare:

> His umbrella was broken of course. John picked it up despondently.

to:

> His umbrella was broken of course. Despondently, John picked it up.

It can be useful to **use complex sentences** :

> A passing car sent a wave of water John's way, as if he wasn't soaked through already.

But don't make _all_ your sentences complex: you want to vary length and structure.

Hope that helps! I think I'll stop ruining John's day at this point.

Original score: 7