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Yes. Not only should you start a new paragraph for every character, but you need to be clear about who is saying or doing what. You mention the excerpt involves 3 characters. We know the first p...
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#4: Attribution notice removed
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/41266 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/41266 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
Yes. Not only should you start a new paragraph for every character, but you need to be clear about who is saying or doing what. You mention the excerpt involves 3 characters. We know the first person part is Nat, the narrator. And of course the parts you label as being from Arden are from that character. But where is Oddie? Is he the speaker in the middle? If so, try this: > “We can just call her Rose,” Arden suggests, leaning back on his hands, any leftover semblances of sleep wiped clear from his face. > > Oddie looks up. “I thought you said that name was already taken?” > > Arden shrugs, toeing the remnants of his cloak over his lap. > > I throw my arms in the air, exasperated.