How can I start in media res and provide enough back-story to hook people, all in the first chapter?
My story (novella?) starts in media res, in the middle of the conflict that will set the rest of the story in motion. Currently I am "scene-cutting" between that event and some earlier events that provide context. The current sequence for the first chapter is:
- main character #1 and main antagonist in main scene
- flashback to MC #1 and MC #2 earlier that day, in which we learn important things about them, the world, and the antagonist
- main scene advances; conflict begins
- flashback to MC #1 and antagonist earlier that day, in which we learn important things about their relationship
- main scene reaches its climax, with bad outcome for MC #1 and chaos for antagonist
My beta readers think this works ok, but I realized in revising that I need to add some more back-story. I need to replace the scene with MC #1 and MC #2 with one that's earlier in time (which is fine), and I also need to show something between MC #2 and someone else who will become important later. But that feels like too much flashback. Also, in the current version MC #1 is in every scene; in this new plan, the scene with MC #2 (and not MC #1) will need good transitions in and out.
Further, this story is set in an alternate world, so I've been trying to avoid "Earth-based" references to show passage of time. How time is counted in this world will come out, but I don't want to add that into the mix. This means I can't easily mark a flashback by outright saying "six months earlier" or the like. I have to show where each scene is placed in time, at least approximately. (Exact timing is not important.)
How should I approach structuring this chapter so that I can hook people with the main scene and still show this back-story? One approach I've considered is to open with the "main scene advances; conflict begins" part (#3 in my list above) as a sort of prologue, and then start chapter 1 with the earliest point in time. But this is approximately a novella, not a full novel, and I'm not sure if a prologue for a shorter work would be hokey or pretentious.
1 answer
Give the location of the scenes as the chapter/scene headers.
If the present-time scenes are in MC 1's house and the flashbacks are in a local coffeehouse (for example), your readers will be able to piece together which scenes go where and they'll know that they are different timelines (since they have some of the same characters).
Indicate the timing based on the position of the sun or other celestial bodies.
You give an example of how you can't say "6 months earlier" but your specific examples all say "earlier that day." Either way, the amount or quality of light will be different, the position of the sun (suns?) will be different and also the moon (moons?) or the visibility of the stars.
Change things about the shared setting based on the passage of time.
If it's the same day, the earlier scene might have people going to work and in the later scene they're going home. Or the newsstand or bakery windows might go from full to nearly empty. Some flowers only bloom during the day, others only during the night; you can show them at the beginning or end of that process.
For longer periods of time, the leaves on the trees may be different colors, or absent, or starting to grow. The fruit trees may be in bloom, or the blossoms might be all over the ground and small unripe fruits have taken their places.
The elements you will use to decide:
- How much time has passed.
- How important it is to show which set of scenes comes first (it might not be important at all because the context of the scenes themselves might reveal that).
- The locations of your sets of scenes.
- What you do or don't want to reveal about the world at this point in the story.
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