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Q&A Writing a long description of a sequence of actions while still being impersonal [closed]

When I try to do this, the description feels very dry, and I am not sure if it's possible to make it feel less dry while still being impersonal and super objective (because I am using a omniscient ...

0 answers  ·  posted 5y ago by repomonster‭  ·  last activity 5y ago by System‭

#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T11:05:48Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/42835
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by user avatar repomonster‭ · 2019-12-08T11:05:48Z (almost 5 years ago)
When I try to do this, the description feels very dry, and I am not sure if it's possible to make it feel less dry while still being impersonal and super objective (because I am using a omniscient and objective pov).

> Isabella walked through the corridor, she then reached the door to her room and opened it. Inside of the room, she found John. He had been there the whole time, waiting for her. Surprised, she let out a small squeal and dropped her handbag. The handbag thumped the floor upon contact as if a large rock had been residing inside it. Startled, John recoiled backward in a sudden movement and unwittingly hit his head onto the wall.

I am not sure if this can be improved. Let me just say I don't really like describing people's emotion. I feel I should avoid it as much as possible. I want to keep it at a minimum if possible.

How can you make the description engaging while staying objective and impersonal?

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2019-03-02T00:39:13Z (over 5 years ago)
Original score: -2