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The narrating voice is, in a sense, having a dialogue with the reader. It would feel odd if the narrator has a different tone and style when telling the story and when talking to other characters i...
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#4: Attribution notice removed
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/46173 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/46173 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
The narrating voice is, in a sense, having a dialogue with the reader. It would feel odd if the narrator has a different tone and style when telling the story and when talking to other characters in the story. In the end, you reader may feel that these are two distinct characters. If no explanation is provided, you may be better off using a different narrator. However, a possible workaround could be to have an opening frame in which you introduce the narrator as a "present persona". You could state that years have passed, and now older and wiser, he has abandoned the verbosity of his youth in favour of a leaner and crispier language, so that all folks may learn from his story. Of course, for the sake of truth, he will try, not without difficulty and perhaps shame, to repeat the same exact words he said back then, with that very pompous tone he used to have.