Post History
This is a frame challenge. I think your issue could also be that your characters do not have a distinct voice. A 15 years old sounds different from a 20 years old. I am not referring to the timbre...
Answer
#4: Attribution notice removed
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/46554 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#3: Attribution notice added
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/46554 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
This is a frame challenge. I think your issue could also be that your characters do not have a distinct voice. A 15 years old sounds different from a 20 years old. I am not referring to the timbre of their voices, which should also be different. The vocabulary is different, the ability to articulate their thoughts is different. Even their logic, their values, their fears, dreams and desires may be different. Regardless of how you call them, these two characters should be easily identifiable by your readers. Suggestions: - timbre and mannerism: the younger character has a higher pitched voice. He may squeak, chirp and squeal at times. The older character has a deeper tone. He may also speak slower. - vocabulary: the younger one repeats himself more often. He uses simpler and more common words. He may try to use words heard from the older one, but not necessarily in the right context. The older one may use slang and jargon to sound cool. - articulating thoughts. The younger one speaks his entire line of thinking, it is linear, and may not branch into a lot of alternative considerations. The older one frequently considers alternatives, which he expresses use longer sentences, and conditional clauses. - logic: the kid has a greater more vivid imagination. Hemay consider things that are outright impossible. He may be more prone to believe based on empathy alone. The older one is more likely to question a statement.