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Q&A Advice on interface text in a videogame

[This fits somewhere between technical writing and user experience, so perhaps this is the wrong board] I'm developing a modification to a popular videogame (a Playstation One RPG), with the expre...

3 answers  ·  posted 13y ago by Jimmy Breck-McKye‭  ·  last activity 5y ago by System‭

#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T01:49:26Z (about 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/3551
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by user avatar Jimmy Breck-McKye‭ · 2019-12-08T01:49:26Z (about 5 years ago)
[This fits somewhere between technical writing and user experience, so perhaps this is the wrong board]

I'm developing a modification to a popular videogame (a Playstation One RPG), with the expressed goal of making in-game interface text easier to understand. There's one particular interface message, however, that I just can't reword elegantly.

Here's the situation: in the game, players may battle monster creatures. In a battle, any participant may use certain kinds of 'special abilities' by drawing on a resource called 'MP'. Each 'special ability' has a particular MP _cost_ associated. Creatures and player characters choose an ability, then, a few seconds later, the game checks their MP resources and decides if it can be used. A character's MP may change between choosing and executing an ability depending on other characters' / monsters' interactions with them (in particular, one party can 'drain' the MP of another, making their turn fail).

Should a monster or character fail to raise enough MP, the game displays a message:

> {Creature / character's name}'s skill power is used up.

This isn't helpful. In the game, 'skills' refer to a very specific sub-set of the abilities that actually cost MP. 'Used up' suggest that the creature has no MP remaining, when in fact it may have plenty - just not enough to execute one particularly costly ability.

I've tried several rewrites, but they're all either unclear or horribly clunky. For example,

> X hasn't enough MP

Which seems vague (though perhaps, in context, users will understand it nevertheless)

> X hasn't enough MP to perform its attack

which is prolix,

> X lacks the MP to perform its chosen move

which is precise but ugly.

I'm struggling to think of any better alternatives that don't mislead the player. I'm not seeking beauty, but I do want _clarity_.

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2011-08-05T18:33:52Z (over 13 years ago)
Original score: 2