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Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/48754
License name: CC BY-SA 4.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

I'm working on a scene in a high-fantasy setting where the main characters greet each other for the first time. Part of the greeting is also a definition of what each of the characters mean to each other. In this case, a flourish of titles establishes expectations:

> Wordlessly, he presented his beautiful, shimmering wife to Mary; who said, “And you, my Sarah: soother of the seas, queen of the oceans, sweet nurturer, and mother of music; I greet you.”

The simplified sentence is trying to say:

> He presented his wife to Mary who said, "Hello."

[Initial question]

What is the proper punctuation for **Mary who said** and for the "Sarah: [list of titles]"?

EDIT:

Semicolons are not necessary for separating the speaker from what she said. There is also no need for a semicolon before the list of titles. Rules would also state that there is no need for a semicolon to separate the long, introductory subordinate clause from the actual subject/verb within the quotes.

I think the answer is:

> Wordlessly, he presented his beautiful, shimmering wife to Mary, who said, “And you, my Sarah, soother of the seas, queen of the oceans, sweet nurturer, and mother of music, I greet you.”

Still unclear on the use of the comma after _Mary, who said_ since the quote has to clearly belong to Mary and not the wife.

Original score: 0