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Location, in a novel, is a protagonist. Protagonists act. If they are not taking part in an action, they don't appear in that section of text. If the location does not take a meaningful part in the...
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#3: Attribution notice added
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/9700 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
Location, in a novel, is a protagonist. Protagonists act. If they are not taking part in an action, they don't appear in that section of text. If the location does not take a meaningful part in the action, it must not appear in the text. Example with person: Your novel is about John and Hannah. In the present scene, John goes to the supermarket alone. You will not write: > John when to the supermarket alone. John entered the supermaket, Hannah didn't. John picked up some apples, while Hannah, who was not there, picked up nothing. John paid for the apples without Hannah. Example with location: John has an accident. You will not write: > John slowly drove along the road. The steering wheel was black, the upholstery was a dark blue. The lights on the dashboard were red. The windshield was a bit dirty at the edges. The road was straight, the asphalt faded to a light grey with age. Yellow lines ran along the curb on either side, glowing softly in the fading evening light. Birds were crossing from left to right on their way to their roost. ... What you will do is describe only what the protagonists _do_, in relation to the story. If the lights on the dashboard irritate the driver, say so, otherwise don't mention them. If the road marking distracts the driver, who is from a country where they have a different color, say so, otherwise don't mention them. In most actions scenes, you don't need a lot of description of the location where that action takes place. I just read _Flash_, by L.E. Modesitt, Jr., a SciFi thriller, and there is a scene where the protagonist enters a building and assassinates another character. He pretends to be visiting one person, but on his way to her kills another person by pretending to going to the toilet (which will explain the time he spent in the builing). All I know after reading that scene is that there is a building, it contains offices, there is a porter, a toilet, an elevator, and hallways. I have no idea what the layout of the building is, how far it is from the toilet to the elevator, or even in which floor the action takes place. Because that is not part of the action the location brings to the story! Of course there are novels that wallow in pages of detailed description. But I guess that using the word "heist" you are not writing in that genre. In your case (as I imagine it) I would reduce the description of place (and characters!) to the bare essentials. That way, the reader will create the place (and person) that for him or her most fits the story. My favourite example is beauty: If you want your protagonist to be beautiful, just say she is beautiful. Don't add any details. That way every reader will see the person he or she finds most beautiful, instead of reading a description that will be hard to transform into an image and that might not be attractive for that particular person, destroying the impact of your plot.