Communities

Writing
Writing
Codidact Meta
Codidact Meta
The Great Outdoors
The Great Outdoors
Photography & Video
Photography & Video
Scientific Speculation
Scientific Speculation
Cooking
Cooking
Electrical Engineering
Electrical Engineering
Judaism
Judaism
Languages & Linguistics
Languages & Linguistics
Software Development
Software Development
Mathematics
Mathematics
Christianity
Christianity
Code Golf
Code Golf
Music
Music
Physics
Physics
Linux Systems
Linux Systems
Power Users
Power Users
Tabletop RPGs
Tabletop RPGs
Community Proposals
Community Proposals
tag:snake search within a tag
answers:0 unanswered questions
user:xxxx search by author id
score:0.5 posts with 0.5+ score
"snake oil" exact phrase
votes:4 posts with 4+ votes
created:<1w created < 1 week ago
post_type:xxxx type of post
Search help
Notifications
Mark all as read See all your notifications »
Q&A

Writing a long description of a sequence of actions while still being impersonal [closed]

+1
−0

Closed by System‭ on Mar 6, 2019 at 18:05

This question was closed; new answers can no longer be added. Users with the reopen privilege may vote to reopen this question if it has been improved or closed incorrectly.

When I try to do this, the description feels very dry, and I am not sure if it's possible to make it feel less dry while still being impersonal and super objective (because I am using a omniscient and objective pov).

Isabella walked through the corridor, she then reached the door to her room and opened it. Inside of the room, she found John. He had been there the whole time, waiting for her. Surprised, she let out a small squeal and dropped her handbag. The handbag thumped the floor upon contact as if a large rock had been residing inside it. Startled, John recoiled backward in a sudden movement and unwittingly hit his head onto the wall.

I am not sure if this can be improved. Let me just say I don't really like describing people's emotion. I feel I should avoid it as much as possible. I want to keep it at a minimum if possible.

How can you make the description engaging while staying objective and impersonal?

History
Why does this post require moderator attention?
You might want to add some details to your flag.
Why should this post be closed?

This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/42835. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.

0 comment threads

0 answers