Foregone conclusion of novel's first part
I'm writing a war sci-fi novel. At the start of the novel, my MC really wants to get into a particular unit, let's call it Space-Marines. His struggle through the training serves to showcase his high motivation, the fact that the soldiers are prepared as well as they can possibly be before being sent off, it lets me set up the character as he was before combat, and more. This later allows me to go on and do to the character everything war can do to a man.
The trouble is, while during training the MC has a clear goal, and struggles to attain it, his success is a foregone conclusion: of course he'll end up in the unit he wants. Otherwise, there won't be a story.
How do I avoid this first part becoming boring to the reader due to its foregone conclusion?
I specifically do not want to just skip it and start, like All Quiet on the Western Front, with the soldiers already at the front and jaded. I want to show "the boy next door" getting to that point.
If you are so sure the reader is going to be sure what happens, then you need to make the journey interesting. There are …
6y ago
Read Starship Troopers by Robert Heinlein. 1. Not every recruit makes it through training or into the unit they wanted. …
6y ago
Add another dimension to the conflict so it is not a simple will he/won't he. There is something (a crutch, a flaw) he i …
6y ago
Add an additional point of uncertainty. "Will the story progress" is not an interesting stakes. But nothing's keeping y …
6y ago
You can make it so the MC doesn't get everything he wants, and at the end of the setup may get into the unit of his choi …
6y ago
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Add an additional point of uncertainty.
"Will the story progress" is not an interesting stakes. But nothing's keeping you from adding other stakes that will grip the reader. Consider, for example:
- Is MC willing to play dirty to secure his place?
- Can MC keep his idealism and enthusiasm as he progresses?
- How will things play out between MC and:
- His bitter rival?
- His love interest?
- His less-capable buddy?
- Who is the MCs shadowy sponsor, who keeps quietly getting him out of trouble?
- Why does this one person seem hell-bent on making MC flunk out?
- Why won't any of the commanders talk about (MYSTERIOUS SUBJECT)?
...And so on. One or two of these will make promises to the reader, that they can look forward to see paying off, and they give your story a much clearer shape.
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Read Starship Troopers by Robert Heinlein.
Not every recruit makes it through training or into the unit they wanted.
The training is fun to read in itself.
The training narrative serves to relate the backstory for the later battle.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35685. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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Add another dimension to the conflict so it is not a simple will he/won't he. There is something (a crutch, a flaw) he is unwilling to give up before he can move to the next stage.
Committing to Space Marines means giving up another dream, or it means compromising an important relationship. His goal is to have it all, but he only gets half.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35684. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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If you are so sure the reader is going to be sure what happens, then you need to make the journey interesting. There are plenty of stories in which everyone knows what's going to happen and enjoys it anyways because the journey is interesting (superhero movies, romance, some mystery stories, etc.).
You could lead the rider away from the truth that he will succeed. Maybe he gets rejected, hurts himself badly, or gets another job. I don't think this is the approach you want to take.
The other approach is to make the journey more interesting. You can start by making the training operations interesting and engage the reader there. You can also use this time to build relationships between characters that will last throughout the novel. See Ender's game for a good example of interesting training. One last idea is to use the time to do some worldbuilding and explain the galaxy via dialogue and discussion between character.
This post was sourced from https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/35702. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
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You can make it so the MC doesn't get everything he wants, and at the end of the setup may get into the unit of his choice, but loses something else along the way.
Give him a friend whose goal is the same, but washes out (or dies).
Give him a girlfriend that leaves him.
Give him a parent he loves that dies, and he misses the funeral because if he does go, he won't be able to get into the unit he wants.
Make him less super-competent, not the top of the class. The reader will think he is on the bubble and will squeak by and get in, but he doesn't. He gets rejected from the unit. But then another recruit that did make it in chooses to drop out, because this other super-competent recruit's lifelong buddy did not get in the special unit with him, and he is a loyal friend that promised they'd serve together. That opens a slot for our guy, and he takes it, but feels illegitimate, dead bottom of the elite unit. Heavily doubted by those that made it on the first cut. And now he has something to prove.
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