Is there such a thing as using too Many "I's" in a first person novel?
For example, would you say this section of copy has too many "I's" or even "my's"?
I woke in a daze. A drug induced daze.
I recognized it instantly, the feeling of being disconnected from my limbs. Only this was much heavier than the brain fog of the little blue and red pills I usually had in my system. Heavy enough, that the moment I opened my eyes, my body wanted them to close again. The urge to sleep was strong, but the scratchy texture of cheap sheets beneath my skin irritated my senses enough to hold sleep at bay. Slowly blinking, the room came into focus.
I was all alone.
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1 answer
Yes, but it is not too many if they are necessary. That said, you should strive to eliminate them when they are NOT necessary. The reader knows who the subject of the sentence is. For example, in your *"I recognized it instantly" passage you have 10 "I or My" and use 82 words. Here it is with 4, using 75 words:
I recognized it instantly, the feeling of being disconnected from my limbs. Only this was much heavier than the normal brain fog of the little blue and red pills in my system. Heavy enough, that the moment my eyes opened, they begged to be closed. The urge to sleep was strong, but the scratchy texture of cheap sheets on skin was irritating enough to hold sleep at bay. Slowly blinking, the room came into focus.
Generally, avoiding "I" and "my" holds the potential to make more compact and interesting writing with different sentence constructs, so it will be less boring. But even if such rewording is possible, don't do it if it sounds awkward.
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