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Q&A

How can you write when you're upset?

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I mean exactly this.

Writing needs focus, to some extent. Even if you may fall into a state were words flow naturally on the keyboard almost without effort, you still have to reach that condition.

Being a very unstable, stressed out, and prone to anger person, I often find myself too upset, distracted or demotivated to write. I'd like to focus on anger in particular, since the demotivated side has been treated a lot on other questions.

How do you manage (if you do) to write when your mind is fuming about what happened during the day? Or what, maybe, is still happening? How do you manage to detatch from the things unnerving you, to find the necessary "private space" to write?

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Depending on the length of the thing you're writing, there are plenty of tasks that are not composing sentences. Perhaps you need to map out exactly how your characters are getting into and out of some critical situation that you have envisioned only at a high level. Perhaps you need to double check how long the train from Rome to Florence takes, or what unexpected weather conditions are likely to be a problem in the area where your story is set. Perhaps it's a good idea to sketch out someone's backstory that you'll be revealing in glimpses over the next few chapters.

If you can do these somewhat mechanical and less creative tasks while you're upset, you will have what you need to hand later, when you're not upset, and are ready to compose sentences. This will make all that go faster.

You may even find that settling in to do the research, the mapping, the listing, the double-checking actually improves your mood so much that you're ready to compose sentences and paragraphs. But even if it doesn't, you're getting work done. Important work.

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angrily

Seriously. When you are upset, write like an upset person. If you don't have a story where the piece fits in, shelve it for further use. Emotions are incredibly powerful in writing, and the strongest writing often comes from authentic emotions.

When you are upset, write about something upsetting. When you are angry, write a piece about an angry person- When you are sad, write that sad ending. When you are happy, write that love story.

Emotions are a tool. Like Nietzsche wrote over a century ago: Do not suppress emotions, use them.

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Speaking as someone who has struggled with the same thing..

*If you are someone who can effectively channel upset feelings into your writing and you have something on the slate that would benefit from the emotion then perhaps shift around your writing schedule to work on that now, it may end up a bit rough around the edges but you can always come back to it and edit when you're feeling calmer.

*If you really need to work on a specific scenes that the upset/anger aren't helpful for then really you need to get that out of your system before you can write. I have a few techniques in my repitoire that I mix and match between depending on what I feel will work best:

  1. Set myself a time limit (usually 15-20mins is all it takes) and write/type out a rant about it, really cut loose, everything you wouldn't say out loud! Then delete/burn/destroy it when you're done. Don't read it, don't dwell on it, just get rid of it.

  2. Exercise (personally I run but whatever works for you) - often stress/tension/anger and similar will have an accompanying tension in your muscles and this can seriously impede your ability to think clearly. Directing this into physical activity can help release this tension.

  3. Councious breathing - this takes a bit of practice first so you can employ the techniques when you need them but if you can find a nice, slow and deep breathing pattern that works for you (the actual pattern is secondary in my experience) the key is to be consciously focused on the act of breathing and to keep it slow and controlled - the most basic being 4 seconds in and 6 seconds out (if you're particularly tall you may need to make those timings longer). Basically this works by convincing your parasympathetic nervous system that you are in a calm situation - essentially reversing the typical cause and effect that causes you to breath shallowly and quickly when stressed out. There's a lot of woo and general rubbish out there on the internet claiming this can cure just about anything but if you ignore all that and stick to the basics the science is sound - this is what they advise for relieving panic attacks and the like and what's a panic attack if not an extreme example of a stress response?

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Writing is where I run to, from everything that upsets me. I read the last scene I've been writing, from the beginning, and by the end - I'm in that moment, I've found my focus, I can proceed from there.

Sometimes I channel frustration, anger, pain, disappointment into my writing: the story demands them all. But it is actually easier for me to write those emotions when I'm separated from them - when I can poke them and observe them, not when they threaten to overwhelm me. When they are not mine, even while being mine. I guess, in this way, writing helps me deal with stuff, though that is not a primary goal.

And if all else fails, I go and read a bit of a good book I've already read. Something to help me calm down, something to inspire me, but not something that would hook me. The Master and Margarita is a particularly good choice: it's about a writer, it serves as a great motivator to write.

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