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The story is third person limited to Bob's point of view. He is with Alice, and I have the following line. Alice sat up proudly, then shrunk back down, realizing where she was. Compare this t...
#3: Attribution notice added
by
System
·
2019-12-08T10:49:17Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/41993 License name: CC BY-SA 3.0 License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision
by
rtpax
·
2019-12-08T10:49:17Z (almost 5 years ago)
The story is third person limited to Bob's point of view. He is with Alice, and I have the following line. > Alice sat up proudly, then shrunk back down, realizing where she was. Compare this to > Alice sat up proudly, then shrunk back down, apparently realizing where she was. This is a tiny change, but without it I am technically breaking the limited scope and seeing into Alice's head briefly. But at the same time, Bob could realistically realize that was what was going on in Alice's head, so it does not seem egregious. The reason I am hesitant to do the second is because I do not want to be constantly hedging statements with things like "apparently" or "seemed to" since it can bog down the writing if used often. So the question: Is it okay to show thoughts of the non-perspective character if the perspective character can reasonably guess them?
#1: Imported from external source
by
System
·
2019-02-06T17:21:30Z (over 5 years ago)
Original score: 16