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Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/44839
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/a/44839
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

The specific details you choose don't matter as much as how you wield them. You want to start out with details that are incredibly subtle. These are less to clue your readers in and more to reward close readers and give "aha!" moments on rereads. Then, move to details that are more noticeable but don't give a complete picture so that your readers start actively guessing what's going on. Gradually increase how blatant the hints are. When you're ready for your monster's identity to be clear, give a final clue or two that ties the whole riddle together for your readers.

* * *

One of my favorite examples of this is the main antagonist in Terry Pratchett's novel _Reaper Man_. It's set up the opposite of your question - it's a blatantly eldritch being with a mysterious and surprising true nature - but the progression of hints is similar to what I think you'd find helpful.

In the story, mysterious snow globes begin spontaneously appearing. They're clearly introduced as being a threat, but what exactly they're doing is left as the mystery that's gradually built up. People who find them start selling them, causing the globes to be distributed around the city that makes the main setting. This is as much the globes' decision as it is the choice of the people trying to make money. This doesn't tip Pratchett's hand in the mystery yet, but when you know what the globes truly are, this makes a lot of sense. It is a deliberately obtuse hint that gives a nice "aha" moment later in the story.

Eventually, the globes hatch and turn into sentient metal carts, which wheel around and cause havoc around the city. Now the clue is impossible to miss and gets you to start thinking. Shortly before the climax, the carts begin congregating near some kind of hive that has just appeared outside the city, and pamphlets of paper advertising new businesses opening up inside the hive start raining from the sky. It's pretty clear at this point that the hive is some kind of predator that wants to lure human victims inside of it, and the carts are its drones. The puzzle pieces start coming together, but the picture is still muddy.

The final battle begins as the protagonists go inside of the hive. The hive is described in lovecraftian language. It's made of large, cavernous hallways that are fleshy but quickly solidifying into some sort of cathedral-like building. Strange words appear on walls. The humans the hive has already consumed have been put under its thrall and forced to dress as guards or clowns. At some point in all of this description, it hits you:

> The "hive" is a sentient shopping mall, and the carts are actually just shopping carts. If the mall wins, it's going to suck the life energy out of the city it's attacking - by turning it into a boring cookie-cutter shopping district!

The way Pratchett handles this build-up is so masterful that he does not refer to the hive's true identity until several dozen pages after the reader has figured it out for themselves, and the way he finally calls the monster by its true name is so casual that it's clear he's confident the reader is already in on the secret. I do recommend reading _Reaper Man_ for a strong example of how to present a mysterious antagonist and give the reader a sense something is off, but not give away exactly what they should be suspicious of until the story wants it to happen.

Original score: 1