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Q&A How to write disorientation with sensory overload?

My character has super-senses, so anything that we feel, see, hear, etc. are heightened for him. So much so that when a flash bomb is set a few meters from him, he is greatly affected by this. Symp...

2 answers  ·  posted 5y ago by Lisa_Yo‭  ·  last activity 5y ago by System‭

#3: Attribution notice added by user avatar System‭ · 2019-12-08T12:46:54Z (almost 5 years ago)
Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/47474
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
#2: Initial revision by user avatar Lisa_Yo‭ · 2019-12-08T12:46:54Z (almost 5 years ago)
My character has super-senses, so anything that we feel, see, hear, etc. are heightened for him. So much so that when a flash bomb is set a few meters from him, he is greatly affected by this.  
Symptoms are loss of balance (b/c it affects the ears), a ringing? sound, and only seeing white for about 5 seconds and then some after images.  
How do I convey the loss of balance without too much description? I want it to cut-cut-cut without using "--" too much. The ringing as well. How do I convey that without an obnoxious onomatopoeia? I can imagine it clearly in my head as if it was a scene from a movie but dang action scenes are difficult for me. But I couldn't avoid it and so here.  
Also, here's an example for one of my drafts. Forgive me if it falls flat or short or confusing.

> Breathe—  
> Breathebreathebreathebreathebreathe  
> FUCK!  
> What—exhale— too bright, too fucking bright—can’t—can’t see—  
> Falling.  
> Falling deep.  
> Falling hard.  
> It hurts.  
> Everything is spinning.  
> What the—what’s hap—  
> Stop—stop, it hurts, fuckfuckfuck—
> 
> A deafening ring resounds.
> 
> “…ter—stand up, get up, please!”
> 
> There are feet running past him.
> 
> (Running into him, digging into his flesh, hurting, hurting, hurting—)
> 
> He can hear the fear in their hearts, and feel the pain in their screams. He lies on the ground, feeling agony like a faraway dream.  
> And even though it hurts, his body is healing far too fast to fail him.  
> He doesn’t know what to do.  
> He can see things, but he doesn’t quite understand why it’s happening.

etc.

#1: Imported from external source by user avatar System‭ · 2019-08-21T16:50:42Z (about 5 years ago)
Original score: 2