How to write a powerful but uncomplicated conference biography?
I am working on a bio for a development conference I am presenting at. My writing style causes my Flesch Reading Ease score to trend high. While I like what I have below I'd like to simplify it a bit without losing impact.
What are some options for simplification?
Andrew earned both a Bachelors and Masters of Business Administration with a concentration in management information systems from the University of New Mexico. Most recently he completed a Masters of Science in Software Engineering from Carnegie Mellon University. Andrew has experience writing and deploying applications in Java, Ruby on Rails, Python, and JavaScript but primarily develops software in C#. He has developed and deployed many enterprise applications for Sandia National Laboratories. In the past year he has assisted Google and NASA with their mobile application development efforts for disaster responders. In addition to coding he is an advocate for agile software development practices and a .NET evangelist at Sandia. He has organized several development communities and both developers and management seek out his perspective on software development.
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1 answer
Rather than "deployed": helped to launch
I've no idea what an "enterprise application" is, so perhaps that could be rephrased.
The problem with "he is an advocate for agile software development practices" is that "agile software development" is an actual jargon phrase. If you don't want it to mess up your readability score, you have to rephrase it entirely as something like "clean and efficient coding," which may not have the same meaning.
Rather than "a .NET evangelist," try "and the use of .NET."
Rather than "and both developers and management seek out his perspective on software development," maybe "making his opinions welcome to those at all skill levels."
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