Post History

Source: https://writers.stackexchange.com/q/17639
License name: CC BY-SA 3.0
License URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

I have a character that, by design, quickly jumps between emotions. To put it into human terms, I have pictured scenes where he will, literally, within the span of a sentence, go from hysterically laughing to bored/work-mode. It's meant to capture his mental instability but I am having problems conveying that in a way that is satisfying to the reader, yet also conveys the fact that he hops around on the emotional spectrum a lot. A simple example would be:

> C1 doubled over cackling maniacally at the scene in front of him. The fires of hell had nothing on the carnage unfolding around him. "I thought you said you were going to bail them out," C2 muttered in exasperation. C1 straightened up. "I get it. Business before pleasure." His exasperation matched C2's as he stepped into the fray.

For whatever reason, that doesn't seem like enough. It's like I can either capture his quick shifts in emotion or explain it out to the reader and it feels like neither accomplish the goal

Original score: 3