What's the proper way of indicating that a car has reached its destination during a dialogue?
What's the proper way of indicating that a car has reached its destination during a dialogue? For example, two persons have a conversation, and they reach a destination, is there a standard way to do this?
For example:
...
"I am not sure if we should really talk about this, because you know, it's a real pain in the ass to talk about personal issues, you know."
"Yeah, it might be true. Let's not talk about this anymore" he said as he looked out the window of the car and saw the headquarter rapidly approaching. "We've reached our destination."
"Already?"
"It has been an hour."
"Jeez, time can fly."
I am not sure why, but revealing it in the dialog tag sounds really weird, is there a better way to do this properly?
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1 answer
You're running into problems because you're putting too much focus on the details of the transition, instead of just marking it as a transition and moving into the next scene.
Try using a single reference to the arrival. For example:
"Yeah, it might be true," he said as he gazed out the window. "We're here. Let's not talk about this anymore."
Or you can skip to an action that makes it obvious they've arrived.
"I am not sure if we should really talk about this, because you know, it's a real pain in the ass to talk about personal issues, you know."
"I guess."
They rode in silence for several more minutes. As they were unloading the car, Fred turned to Gina. "Let's not talk about this anymore."
Or you can end the scene while they're in the car and skip to the next one, whenever it may be.
"I am not sure if we should really talk about this, because you know, it's a real pain in the ass to talk about personal issues, you know."
"I guess."
At dinner that night...
Put in enough information that it's really clear to the reader where and when the characters are. But don't feel you need to spell it out. Your audience will fill in the gaps. So let them. It's part of what allows a reader to bond with the story.
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